Fair warning
I. Stylesheet
He says, "It's fine."
2. Do (not) use curly quotes
Although in email etc. 'straight quotes' are the norm, in printed books publishers use 'curly quotes'. For comparison:
You can easily convert (most) straight quotes to curly quotes using a search / replace in Word. Replacing single curly quotes is slightly trickier, but searching for [space]+['] will allow you a manual search and check.
You could let Word / Google Docs correct them on the fly for you, but if you're doing a lot of dialogue editing I found both word processors (who still uses that word these days!) to get confused now and again. I went as far as disabling smart quotes until the final pass.
Here's how to convert from straight to curly and the other way around using word:
3. Use single quotes to 'quote' someone inside dialogue
"He said, 'take your hands off her,' but didn't do anything," she told me.
The above is called 'elevation'.
4. Use single quotes to quote anything
As my grandparents used to say, 'These modern-day birds can't raise their voices properly anymore!'
Or, inserting a piece of cynicism...
He thought of her 'great' friends, and shuddered.
He said, "You have 'great' friends."
In other words, single quotes to quote, double quotes to say.
CMOS: Note that the above is formally WRONG according to the CMOS, though it's used quite a bit.
The correct way to do it, according to CMOS, is to always start with the base quote form, then elevate it where needed:
He thought of her "great" friends, and shuddered.
He said, "You have 'great' friends."
In the first line it's a quote, in the second line it's an elevation. The base quote signs here are US style straight double-quotes.
Note that in several other languages the rules may be different, but hey, I said I would be adopting the US format.
Whatever you do, stick to one format, and keep it.
4. Use single quotes or italics to create 'objects'
He said, "I think you're right," and ignored the new 'traveler'.
He said, "He's one of the new travelers."
He said, "He's one of those 'travelers'."
Note where the closing period goes, as opposed to dialogue!
CMOS: Using the formal rule you would use double quotes unless elevated. That would look like this:
He said, "I think you're right," and ignored the new "traveler".
He said, "He's one of the new travelers."
He said, "He's one of those 'travelers'."
The bottom line has 'elevated' quotes.
Frankly, that first line is ugly. In the example above I'd probably resort to italics, as in:
He said, "I think you're right," and ignored the new traveler.
5. Use italics (cursive, oblique, whatever) for accents, focus points, and internal thoughts
If your format allows cursive / italics / oblique then that's another way to accentuate sections, express sarcasm, and thoughts. In the line below you can see the internal dialogue (unspoken thoughts) as well as spot the 'sarcastic' part of her thoughts (using single quotes):
How 'wonderful' of him to say so, she thought.
CMOS: italics is fine, but you could also use the following format:
How "wonderful" of him to say so, she thought.
Now, in the old days, there was no way to print italics that easily, so authors used underline in manuscripts, and home-writers had to settle for alternatives. If you use single quotes for thoughts, this may cause some confusion. Here are some variants:
How 'wonderful' of him to say so, she thought."How 'wonderful' of him to say so", she thought.
'How 'wonderful' of him to say so', she thought.
'How wonderful of him to say so', she thought.
How 'wonderful' of him to say so, she thought.
Depending on your school of thought, all of these are valid (or most of them are wrong 😔) but most writers will settle for italics.
CMOS:
"How 'wonderful' of him to say so", she thought.
How "wonderful" of him to say so, she thought.
6. To accentuate sections, express sarcasm, use either single quotes or italics or both
We're entering dangerous territory here, but it sometimes might help.
"How 'wonderful' of him to say so," she replied.
How 'wonderful' of him to say so, she thought.
CMOS:
"How 'wonderful' of him to say so," she replied.
How "wonderful" of him to say so, she thought.
7. Don't use the semi-colon, unless you know what you're doing
A comma glues two parts of a sentence together, indicates list segments or pauses (though not in English). A period indicates the end of one sentence and the start of another one. A semicolon... Well, it's like a period, only less so.
Some use 'm. Some don't. I don't.
8. The colon is used to indicate an explicit conclusion, but can often be replaced by a comma
It can also be connected to dialogue in some languages and regions.
Use it sparingly, if at all. As a ground rule: a colon is followed by an explanation.
He reached his final conclusion, his girlfriend was a liar.
He reached his final conclusion: his girlfriend was a liar.
He reached his final conclusion, his girlfriend was a liar.
9. Example
The room was dark and empty. The sign on the door told him it was 'Waiting Room 303'. He tried the doorknob and found the door unlocked. Peter cautiously opened the door, then toggled the light switch, and found no evidence she'd ever been here.
Jerry and Tom followed him after a little hesitation.
"Where is she?" Peter muttered, mostly to himself.
Jerry shrugged. The girl was mad anyway. Who'd care if she had already left? But instead, he said, "She told us she'd wait for us here."
Tom shook his head. "No, that's not what she said. She said, 'I'm only going to wait for you three stupids for half an hour.' And I think" -- he pointed at his watch -- "we're too late."
"We're too late because of her," Peter grumbled.
"We're late because you couldn't make up your mind!" Tom spoke sharply, not trying to hide his anger.
Peter was about to give his friend a piece of his mind when he noticed Jerry shaking his head and silently mouthing "Later. Not now."
"Whatever," Peter muttered. He'd get back to the subject later, he promised himself. And then he would have some very nice words for Tom and his mindless accusations. Who did Tom think he was?
More on quotation signs
II. Who says what?
- Would your character use those words?- How would he / she speak?- Does your character have specific speech patterns?
Dutch - Peter zei: "Is hij ziek?"
US - Peter said, "Is he sick?"
UK - Peter said, 'Is he sick?'
French (variant) - Peter said << Is he sick? >>
Note: you may have hears of the UK 'place comma outside the speech quotes' rule, but that one has only to do with direct quotes.
US - The UWSC says that American people write it "this way."
UK - The UWSC says that British people people write it 'this way'.
Avoid confusion
"Are you sure he's sick?""I absolutely am. No way he would skip out.""So... We have to find a solution.""Do we? I'm not so sure we have to.""O yes, we do. I suggest we start by watering down the story.""The truth, you mean.""And leave out the worst parts.""Small doses.""We kill his cat.""His cat? Do we really have to?"
Peter asked, "Are you sure he's sick?"John said, "I absolutely am. No way he would skip out."Peter said, "So... We have to find a solution."Amanda said, "Do we? I'm not so sure we have to."John said, "O yes, we do. I suggest we start by watering down the story."Amanda said, "The truth, you mean."Peter said, "And leave out the worst parts."John said, "Small doses."Peter said, "We kill his cat."Amanda asked, "His cat? Do we really have to?"
"Are you sure he's sick?" Peter asked.The little campfire was illuminating their faces. Nobody looked particularly happy.John nodded vigorously. "I absolutely am. No way he would skip out.""So..." Peter looked at his friends, studying their faces before reaching a conclusion. "We have to find a solution""Do we?" Amanda shrugged. "I'm not sure we have to."Doubtful as ever, John thought. He sighed and said, "Oh yes, we do. I suggest we start by watering down the story.""The truth, you mean."John shrugged. She wasn't entirely wrong, but John knew what was coming next. They all knew."And leave out the bad parts," Peter said, ignoring Amanda's comment.John took out his notebook and his pen. He clicked it a few times before opening the book and putting the tip of his cheap Bic ballpoint down on the paper. "Small doses," he confirmed, waiting for Peter to continue.Peter stood up and stared at the flames. After pondering the consequences he finally made his decision. "We kill his cat," he said.Amanda looked shocked. "His cat? Do we really have to?"
- anything in passive voice
- words (verbs) ending on '-ing'
- body movement that isn't essential
Dialogue Tags, Action Beats
"Let me help you," he said."Let me help you," he walked away.
"This looks weird.” She squints at her steak. “Can BBQ sauce go bad?"
"This looks weird,” she says, squinting at her steak. “Can BBQ sauce go bad?"
"This looks weird"--she squints at her steak--"can BBQ sauce go bad?"
"This looks weird,” she squints at her steak, “can BBQ sauce go bad?"
"This looks weird,” she squints at her steak. “Can BBQ sauce go bad?"
"You are --" He looks at his watch. "Four hours late.""You are" -- he looks at his watch -- "four hours late.""You are..." He looks at his watch. "Four hours late.""You are..." He looks at his watch. "... four hours late.""You are," he looks at his watch, "four hours late."
"You are --" He says. "Four hours late.""You are" -- he says -- "four hours late.""You are..." He says. "Four hours late."
"You are..." he says, "... four hours late."
"You are," he says, "four hours late."
"You are --" He says and looks at his his watch. "Four hours late.""You are" -- he says and looks at his watch -- "four hours late.""You are..." He says and looks at his watch. "Four hours late.""You are..." he says and looks at his watch. "... four hours late.""You are," he says and looks at his watch, "four hours late."
"You have arrived," he says and looks at his watch, "four hours late.""You have arrived," he says, "four hours late.""You have arrived," he looks at his watch, "four hours late.""You have arrived." He looks at his watch. "Four hours late."
"You have arrived" -- he looks at his watch -- "four hours late."
III. Punctuation
Peter said: "I know.""I know," Peter said."I know," Peter said, "and so does he.""I know," Peter said. "And so does he."
Peter said, "I know.""I know," Peter said."I know," Peter said, "and so does he.""I know," Peter said. "And so does he."
"There is a mistake." He picks up the book. "It's right here.""There is a mistake," he picks up the book, "it's right here.""There is a mistake." He picks up the book, "it's right here."
"There's a mistake on page thirty," he pointed out."There's a mistake on page thirty." He pointed out."There's a mistake on page thirty." He said.
"I'm too busy," she sighed, "come back tomorrow.""I'm too busy." She sighed. "Come back tomorrow.""I'm too busy." She sighed, "come back tomorrow."
he said
he pointed outhe gruntedhe wheezedhe whisperedhe wishedhe continuedhe laughedhe snickered
- Dash is a single dash, or -
- En-dash is a bit longer, sometimes depicted as --
- Em-dash is another, even longer dash, sometimes depicted as -- or ---
1. '--' is sometimes used as a replacement for the 'em-dash'. Strictly spoken, the 'em-dash' is a kind of 'longer' 'supersized' dash. I don't like the '--' in that case, but it strongy simplifies life.2. I've also seen '--' used in scientific literature to attribute a quote to its source, both in its real em-dash form, as well as a double hyphen:
'Facts are stubborn things' -- Mollet
'Facts are stubborn things' — Mollet
3. Most authors don't discern between the regular dash and the em-dash, and software such as Word tries to decide for you which one you wanted... Use '--' and leave it up to the publisher.4. Some publishers don't care about the em-dash either, and use a regular dash instead.
This actually is a formal variant, even according to the CMOS.
5. Then, finally, software that is aware of the difference sometimes uses the wrong type. Word, for example, does mess up now and again.
IV. Group conversation
- organized, one way, controlled, a boss to his employees, a Sergeant to his soldiers
- disorganized, messy, uncontrolled, friends in a bar, classmates in a break
' Here's my suggestion as someone who still tries to avoid writing group conversations. Firstly, try to get some inspiration. Lilly-rain's 'She's One Of The Boys' on Wattpad where the MC has group conversations with her five brothers! If you find reading group conversations stressful, then try watching shows like Friends where characters speak in a group because the dialogue is scripted but made to appear casual.Once you get an idea for how they work, try to write down all the key points that you want to include in the conversation, and allocate them to different characters. I'd recommend using '(character's name) said' for every character instead of searching for more elaborate dialogue tags- this can all be done later. Don't worry if you don't include all of them! In real life, some people hardly contribute to group discussions whereas others practically lead them.After you've got the key ideas, add in some short quirky dialogue snippets of agreements, disagreements and banter from the characters that maybe you haven't used yet. This'll make the dialogue seem even more casual. Next, add all your body gestures and action, making sure to get around most of the group. Again, don't feel like every character has to be involved, some will just be standing there and listening.Finally, add a few fancy dialogue tags -- but don't be afraid to keep some of the 'said' in there -- and you've got yourself an amazing group conversation!Hope this helps! If you like, feel free to send me a draft and I can give feedback if you still feel unsure. '
David frowns, looking at the latter. "Is that a Poire Belle Helene?"William nods fervently."And that?" David points at the glass, his frown deepening.In the background, Laura Branigan's Self Control starts playing.William empties his mouth. "Lemon cheesecake caramel with peanut butter!" he exclaims."There's no accounting for taste," Aaron comments, looking for his second banana. He successfully spears it, presents it to the world, then takes a large bite and swallows. With his eyes half-closed he mumbles, "Ah... Bliss--Man, we missed you."William nods. "Yep. That, and the free lunches.""You're impossible, the two of you. All of you." Camelia comments.Lug just smiles.Aaron opens his eyes in exaggerated shock, then gets halfway up, mock offended. "My brother is impossible, let me apologize on his behalf. And, as his eclectic selection in ice cream and friends prove time and time again, he has no taste either." He grins and makes a mock bow in first David's, then Camelia's direction, making absolutely sure we're all paying attention when he turns to me and bows more deeply. "...except when it comes to girls," he adds in a stage whisper.His brother punches him, and Aaron's spoon nearly takes out my left eye. I suppress a little smile. Their bantering makes me uncomfortably comfortable."Hey, stop hurting my guests! I still need them. Well, some of them, at least." David's pointed stare does stop Aaron and William's ice cream battle. For now."For what?" I ask.David looks down and hesitates. "I euh...""Out with it," Lug says."I asked you all here... " David starts."You don't want my second kidney?" Aaron asks his brother.William shakes his head. "Nah, one is enough.""You never asked me," I point out."About my kidney, why would I?" William asks, frowning at me.Did he just make a joke, or is he serious? I can't tell.
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