Friday, October 28, 2022



Nine: "Have you done formatting before?"

Mathieu: "No."

Nine: "No... You've never done formatting before?"

Mathieu: "No, never."

Nine: "Fuck me."


It's time to nail rule number 7: Don't attempt to write elaborate stories before you've mastered the very basics.


Nine (quietly to the camera): "Anyone who hasn't actually done formatting before shouldn't be owning a fucking writing server."


Nine: "Paragraph your manuscript and we'll save the juice, yeah? Have you done paragraphing before?"

Mathieu: "No."

Nine: "You're pulling my plonker now, aren't you?"

Mathieu: "Ok, we could shout or you could fucking help, I don't mind."

Nine: "What do you mean, fucking help? What have we been doing for the last two hours?"

Mathieu: "Alright, fine. So we want it in here..."

Nine: "I'm just amazed you've never done paragraphing."

Mathieu: "What are you pissing at me for?"

Nine: "I don't think you can actually write."


< inaudible argument >


Nine: "So should I show you how to paragraph?"

Mathieu: "Oh, at last! Yes, please!"

Nine: "Are you gonna tone your voice down or shout like some dick?"

Mathieu: "I'll shout like some dick and then I'll calm down."

Nine: "Right. Now fuck off to my blog, read how to paragraph and come back and see me. And I'll run your fucking server."

Mathieu (walks off): "Thank you."

Nine: "Plonker."

Mathieu: "Twat." 

(c2021 Mathieu on the Wattpad+ Discord server)

Darn, I couldn't help but laugh out loud. Well done, Mathieu!


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